“I have a highly irrational relationship with chipmunks. I hate them.”
— John Teza, CEO, Hand & Stone
In her monthly "Grab Bag" column, Editor in Chief Laura Michaels asks the tough questions—What superhero power would you most like to have? What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?—to show a side of franchising execs you don’t normally see.
Who is an actor you would watch in anything?
There’s two: Helen Mirren and Harrison Ford. Think about the recent roles they’ve played. Helen in ‘1923’ and now ‘MobLand.’ Matriarchs in both, really strong personalities but two very different roles. And then Harrison Ford, also in ‘1923’ and then ‘Shrinking.’ Unbelievable. Their careers, they just get better and better.
What fictional character do you think would be most interesting to meet in real life?
President Jed Bartlet from the ‘West Wing.’ I love that character. So intelligent, and he’s always thinking several moves ahead. One of his catchphrases was, ‘What’s next?’, and that’s very aligned with my leadership strategy. He’s one of the most well-written characters in TV history.
What’s your biggest pet peeve?
I have a highly irrational relationship with chipmunks. I hate them. They have destroyed several aspects of the hardscaping in my backyard, and I spend far too much time plotting the demise of these chipmunks that live in my backyard.
What’s something you would seriously stockpile if you found out it wasn’t going to be sold anymore?
I’m a coffee junkie; I drink six cups a day. I’m not proud of it, and those closest to me might call me a bit of a coffee snob. So, if I knew it was going to be discontinued, any of the Starbucks Reserve dark roasts or La Colombe’s Corsica, I would stockpile those.
What’s one trend you wish would disappear?
The whole influencer trend, right? The idea that somebody can just get a big following, and then people pay them to put stuff on their feeds, and other people follow the things that they’re promoting. I mean, we do benefit from it, but it’s one I just don’t get.
If you could join any TV show family, which would it be?
‘Ted Lasso,’ for sure. I think it’s maybe the greatest piece of scripted content ever. The writing on it was unbelievable, the acting on it was unbelievable. It was timely. It was poignant. It was inspiring. There’s no doubt about it. I would love to be a part of that.
Which time period in history would you want to visit?
I went to college at The College of William & Mary, and there is a living museum that’s connected to it, Colonial Williamsburg. It’s a time period I’ve loved since I was a little kid, and then, ironically, getting to go to school almost immersed in that; it was so cool. It was sort of the cauldron of the initial American experience. And to have been a part of the initial experience of the United States of America would have been so cool. Just think about the leaders that came out of that period and their impact on who we are as a society.
What chore do you absolutely hate doing?
Weeding, I hate weeding. It’s painful. I hate it so much that I started using weed killer, and I’m really bad at it. There’s two strips of the lawn that are right along my hardscaping on my driveway that are now browned out because I overused it.
What’s your guilty pleasure?
I love to curate playlists; I have since college. I used to make great mix tapes. Now I use Spotify, and I love going genre-based or going season-based, and then I name them. One of my favorites ever was called ‘Leaves’ Last Call.’ It was a Thanksgiving playlist I made a 10 years ago.